How to make the best experience at your afternoon tea event.
Afternoon tea is all about enjoying delightful treats and selecting lovely teas. It’s also steeped in tradition and etiquette.
To help fully immerse yourself in the occasion, here are some classic tips on afternoon tea etiquette.
Following these suggestions will help you enjoy this wonderful tradition with grace and confidence.
The Invitation and Arrival
Afternoon tea is a refined gathering, so arriving on time is a must! If you’re invited to an afternoon tea, try to be punctual as it shows respect for the host and allows the tea service to start smoothly. Please put your phone away!
Dress to Impress
Tea time is a wonderful occasion to dress up a little. Think semi-formal or “smart casual” attire. Ladies may enjoy wearing dresses, skirts, or dressy pants, while men may opt for slacks and a nice shirt. Hats and gloves are optional but add a delightful, vintage flair! If you have a fascinator lying around, feel free to wear it as fancy hats are encouraged at afternoon tea!
Napkin Etiquette
When you sit down, place your napkin on your lap to catch any crumbs. If you need to leave the table, place your napkin on your chair rather than on the table. When you’ve finished, loosely fold your napkin and place it to the left of your plate.
How to Hold Your Teacup
The correct way to hold a teacup is to pinch the handle with your thumb and index finger, while letting your other fingers rest gently. Contrary to popular belief, there’s no need to extend your pinky—it’s perfectly polite to keep all fingers relaxed.
Stirring Your Tea
To stir your tea, move the spoon gently in a back-and-forth motion (without clinking against the sides of the cup). Once stirred, place the spoon on the saucer beside your cup—not back in the cup itself.
Adding Milk (Cream) or Lemon
Traditionally, milk (or cream) is added to black teas, while lemon is a popular addition to green or herbal teas. It’s not recommended that you mix milk (cream) with lemon as the lemon can cause the milk to curdle. Sugar cubes are the traditional way of sweetening tea and honey can be an option as well. Add your milk (cream) after the tea has been poured to ensure the correct ratio.
The Order of Enjoying Your Treats
Afternoon tea is typically served on a three-tiered tray, with each tier offering different treats:
- Start with savouries like finger sandwiches from the bottom tier.
- Move on to scones on the middle tier, and don’t forget the clotted cream, lemon curd and jam!
- Finish with the sweets on the top tier.
Enjoying each tier in this order allows you to savour the full progression of flavours.
Eating Scones
When enjoying your scone, break it apart gently with your hands (never cut it with a knife!). Spread a small amount of cream and jam or lemon curd on each half as you eat, rather than smothering it all at once. This lets you enjoy a fresh bit of cream and jam with each bite.
Avoid Dunking
While dunking biscuits or pastries in tea may be common at home, it’s best avoided at a formal tea party. Enjoy each bite and sip on their own, allowing the flavors to stand out.
Gentle Conversation
Tea time is a moment for pleasant conversation. Keep the atmosphere light and avoid topics that might feel heavy or controversial. Afternoon tea is meant to be relaxing, offering a chance to connect and enjoy each other’s company.
Say “Thank You”
If you’re attending a tea hosted by someone else, be sure to express your gratitude. A simple “thank you” to the host or a quick note afterward is a wonderful way to show your appreciation.